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TIES THAT BIND

Shee The poet: The last time we had sex really did feel like a finale, a culmination. Our tears had abated. We channelled our remaining emotions into the act, had a cathartic experience. Then we fell asleep next to each other once more. And you sneaked out in the middle of the night again, for the last time... Just so you know. That same way you left my house, is the same way you've left my heart. All I've left is your scent on my sheets and tears in my eyes.

Zi Boy: Don't tell me that you don't want me near,,,don't tell me you forget so fast, you say all you have left is my scent and tears welled up,how can you forget how I made you feel?
How I made you run to the edge of the bed,,,how you sat there confused,,whether to come back or dress up.
I am left with lots more than just your erotic moan,,,tell me you are only pretending to feed your ego

Shee The poet: I don't want a one night stand. A one life stand is what i crave. I'm overwhelmed with the painful injustice of love and mismatched feelings. I can't forget how you made me feel on some nights. A slice of heaven. But yet again i can't forget how you made me feel when the sun shone bright.  Two slices of hell.

Zi Boy: A one life stand is nothing in my love dictionary,,,so who do you want me to wife in my afterlife or did you just mean till death do us part?? You are a part of me that became whole, how you made my blood pump brought me to life,,,but am not sure if this is love or some emotional love story

Shee The poet: If this is love then i have a different definition of the word. I am not accustomed to this. Yes i did say that I'll be there in sadness and happiness but not when sadness exceeds happiness. A happily ever after only did exist in my dreams and it's time i woke up.

Zi Boy: Keep calm my dear, you know how I hold you so dear,, my expensive gem, my addictive charm, come and lean on my arm one more time. Lets break up to make up for the last time,
I miss your face without make up
For the cries and sadness my rejuvenated self will make up
Just hold my hand and let my heart lead us on

Shee The poet: It isn’t your fault, really. I was foolish to believe I could make a change. Dumb enough to allow myself dangled in a limbo of uncertainty. Idiotic enough to let myself compromise on the standards I held on for years. An imbecile to grant you the permission to make me feel insufficient and doubt my self-worth.

To say that I am heartbroken is an understatement. To know that you truly desire me and yet not choose me is devastating. I have no regrets cringing every time I see pieces of you in the little things you got for me.

Zi Boy: Mummy,,don't cry over spilt milk,,it will only add to the fact that you are broken and confused. I know you are poor at making real life decision and that you are planning to settle with another man who promises you happiness. I also know that apart from drama and poetry I was your favorite hobby
And letting that leave your mind will be hypocritical I wont lie that I will love you the African way,,to hell with the promises. I wont lie that I will always be there for you because my time needs me too. But trust me on this, I will give you no reason to doubt me, I will try as much too make you happy as long as it doesn't make me cry.

Shee The poet: You're my favorite boy no doubt about that. For I believe in the sacredness that lies in the word love. To utter 'i love you' requires great courage, commitment  and suffering. Are you ready for all this? I guess not. Against my intuition, against my logic  and standards, i told you i will wait for you. I still wait. I still choose to hope. I still hold on to the fact that perhaps you will be inspired to cross the bridge some day. Maybe a change of heart on your part.

Zi Boy: Don't hold on,,,try and move on
Get past me, get past how I made you feel, kiss all the frogs in your kingdom but when you finally decide to take a shower please sing a song for me
Sing of how I made you feel
Sing  of how you really wanted this to work out but the word exercise was your co wife
Sing of how I made you feel like a person whose skin was dragged across broken pieces of glass
Cry.
Let your tears flow, let your hair relax and sob till you can no more
But remember when all that is done
I will be there next to you
Holding you tightly against the wall, kissing you all over again this time with a greater sense of affection because I just realised you are Gods greatest invention

Shee The poet: Be my captain and i promise not to abandon ship. Hold on its going to be a long journey. Waves might come our way but i trust you as the captain. 
Stay.. Let's have a one life stand.

Zi Boy: I wish I could but unfortunately am sea sick
Forget about the waters,,they are never still
Could we fly high? We could be the epitome of love, saying this from the bottom of my heart,,like a newborn love is the placenta that got me attached to you

Shee The poet: You're my disarray
You compel my speechlessness
You keep me sane by driving ng me insane about you
When the dust settles and all the smoke clears, I'll be here for many more years.
Till we're old and gray.

© *Shee The Poet x Doluh words*
*2018*

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